Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Lonely

My truck has been broken down off and on for the last several months and I have pretty much given up on it ever being of much use to me. I am ready to abandon ship and just get rid of the dream of making it my dream ride. I take the bus now and I guess I don't mind it too much. There is a certain freedom that comes with being able to go where you want whenever you want but there is also a certain sense of relief that comes when I am reminded that it doesn't cost me $75 every week or so to fill up my tank. It does get very frustrating however when the bus is late and I consequently miss my transfer bus and consequently arrive late for work not to mention half frozen.

So as usual today, I waited for the bus wondering if it would be on time, just a few minutes late or an exceptional 25 minutes late as it was last week. I kind of like riding the bus though. It is really interesting to see the different people who ride the bus. It's also relaxing to not have to battle traffic on the road. I pulled out my cell phone to call my brother. He and his wife are both students at BYU-Idaho.

Today as I rode the bus to work I reflected on how much more content I am with life in general. I really feel like I am ready to move on with life and start working on my long term goals again. I also reflected on my family. I have lived away from them for some time, but I still keep very close to them. I literally talk to my mother and father every day and at least two of my three siblings everyday. I have expanded my cell phone plan specifically for that purpose.

Life has been pretty good lately. I have been working through some things but overall positive. Last year around this time I was in a very different place as a person and today I feel much more whole and much more stable. But again I find myself very sad. Like last year I will spend yet another Christmas away from my family.

I am very very close to them.

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